All a Part of our Wholeness.

THS Whole Retreat Reflection written by Kym Lee

For a long time, I wondered what was wrong with me. I thought I should just be happy because nothing really bad has happened. Of course, marriage and raising 3 kids has moments of hard, but God has been so kind and gracious, and there’s a joy and peace in Jesus that I’ll never be able to fully explain. But I always wondered why I also felt a sadness, not a diagnosable depression or complex PTSD, but just a sadness here and there. The retreat really helped me to reconcile and embrace the both and as part of my wholeness. 

Both and.

Happiness and grief.

Happy to give my kids a childhood…
and to grieve the childhood I never had

Happy to see my kids play & have play dates…
and to grieve that I didn’t get to play because I had to work at our family business

Happy to cook a meal for my family…
and to grieve that I never saw my mom cook because she wasn’t around

Happy to travel the world with my kids…
and to grieve how very few vacations we ever took

Happy to take my kids to sports & activities…
and to grieve that I didn’t have rides to go anywhere

Happy to cheer my kids on & be on the sidelines…
and to grieve that I had to convince my mom to come to my graduation & wedding

Happy to celebrate birthdays & throw parties for my kids…
and to grieve that my parents didn’t remember my own birthday

Motherhood and childhood.

Beauty and brokenness.

Both and.

All a part of our wholeness.

Follow Kym @kymlee07 for more.